Bathroom Rules At Work

Try as I might, I cannot fake out the auto flushing sensors on the toilets at work. When somebody is using the urinal when I walk in, I head to a stall to pee. When I’m done, I try tricking the sensor by doing things like covering it with my hand all the way to standing on one foot while the other hovers 6 inches from the sensor. Nothing I do gets the toilet to flush. I had to actually sit on the seat for about 5 seconds and then get up to get the toilet to flush. (It’s a weird feeling to sit on an open toilet seat with your pants pulled up.) But I can’t do that because of my “no shitting at work” policy (it includes a “no pretend shitting to fool the toilet sensor” provision I didn’t know about until I stumbled onto this problem). So now I silently stare at the floor when my teammates complain about someone in the office who chronically doesn’t flush after peeing in the toilets.

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