This is Baltimore, yo.

Returning from the grocery store last night, I parked behind a Ford Taurus on my street.  I stared through the rear window of this car for 15 solid seconds before cutting the engine and turning off the headlights.  There were giant shapes in the back seat, and, in that moment, I absolutely needed to figure out what they were.  I passed by with groceries in hand and immediately placed the items: a flock of swans, jumbled together, made out of empty gallon milk jugs and paper accoutrements.  All I could think of as I walked up my sidewalk was, “I hope they left the back doors unlocked, because those are getting stolen with or without broken windows.”

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